The Art of Bingo Calling

Me (basically)

Bingo calling isn’t as easy as it looks; it’s not just about calling numbers. Well it is, but a good bingo caller knows that there is an art to bingo calling. Numbers are exciting, especially when they’re generated randomly- you never know what’s coming next. There are 90 numbers in bingo, now I’m no statistician but the odds of having 4 numbers from the 40’s in a row aren’t too high. That’s why it’s so exciting when it happens!

If I commented on all the interesting number sequences, no one would ever get bingo, so I use exaggerated intonation to emphasise the excitement. “forty- naughty forty, forty eight- four eight, forty five- half way there” and then “foooooorty threeeee, four three” but you have to say it like you just found out you won the lottery. The great thing is, the crowd get into it too; listen to the oohs and aahs when they hear such a rare and wondrous sequence of numbers.

The drama doesn’t end there, oh no. A big talking point, is how many calls it takes someone to get bingo in. A few weeks ago I announced that a certain bingoer won in just 52 calls, only to have the room erupt in applause.

I like for my bingo to have a little more crowd participation. My favourite bingo ladies sit up the back, maybe it’s all the scotch they drink at 11am, but they are by far the most enthusiastic. I’m all about the old school bingo calls; legs 11, 66 clickety click etc. The great things about these chicks is they respond to a bunch of the calls I make:

‘4- knock on the door’ (avon calling)

‘14- valentines day’ (kiss, kiss)

‘22- 2 ducks swimming’ (quack, quack)

‘64- everybody sings (when I’m 64)

‘69- breakfast for two’ (bad breath)

For an excellent article on how to call bingo, and a whole lot more number nicknames, check out this website.

Bingo

I’ve spent a lot of time writing about busking but not much about my other job. I work mostly as a bartender, but every Monday I take on a new role; I am the bingo caller.

I got the gig a few years ago when the old bingo caller left and my manager was complaining that he was going to have to take over.

“Oh boy I’d kill to do bingo!” I said

“Oh yeah” he said sarcastically “it’s going to be great”

“..it sounds like so much fun”

“Yeah, you’re really missing out, it’s going to be a party”

“I wish I could do it…”

“I really don’t want to do it…”

I looked at him “Wait. Do you seriously not want to do it?”

“Do you seriously want to do it?”

And that’s how I became the bingo caller.

It turns out bingo is serious. In North America you can win big bucks, up to $10,000, but here you’re lucky if you get a $20 woolies gift voucher. Despite the relatively low stakes, bingo players, in my opinion, are among the most competitive people in the world. The great irony is that bingo is almost entirely luck.

If you are a competitive person, and you don’t win at something, and it’s not your fault, it must be someone else’s fault, right? That someone is usually me.

Bingo players are generally older. Mine range from about 50 to 102. No joke 102 year old Albert comes to bingo every week for a chance to score a $15 Woolworths wish card.

I think at 102 you should get anything you want, which makes it hard for me when he gives me a stern look and says “You’d better call my numbers today”

I look at the random number generator.

“You’d better call Albert’s numbers today”

To be fair, players know that responsibility does not lie completely with me. Lucky rituals have a big impact as well. According to bingo players, your luck will change depending on where you sit, who you sit with and what colour dobber you use.

I recently made the fatal mistake of getting the wrong coloured dobbers. Whilst I was ordering I was asked if I wanted any colour in particular. No, I didn’t mind. WRONG! Apparently orange is not a good colour for my bingo ladies failing eyesight. Unfortunately we’ve got to get through 250 more dobbers before I can order a new box. Orange you glad I didn’t get yellow?